223/365 My Battles with Smoking

I started smoking when I was 18 years old. During my college days. Before that I had tried it a few times. Even as young as 6th grade. While I was in school in my 10th grade.. there were a few of my batch mates who regularly smoked. There was this Juice shop outside the school which had a room in the back where the kids would go and smoke. I have been there a few times. But I never took a puff.

Even today I wonder why did I start smoking when in college. I had friends who did smoke and I was fascinated with it. This was the year 1989 and while everyone knew it was bad… it did not have the kind of bad name it has now…

When I think back.. if I was not that persistent I might not have caught up the habit. It took me probably a few months to even start inhaling the shit in… Imagine.. I spoked it just for showing off for a long time.

I even remember a trip I went first year in college when I just blowed smoke without inhaling and my entire mouth was sore.. Why did I do that.. I cannot rewind back the time and make the right decisions. If there is one thing I have felt over and over that I could not have started… it is this one thing called smoking.

Before I go further.. Let me tell you that I have not had a puff for the last two years… And I like to think I have left it behind me. I have done one year before… not once twice.. but this has been the longest….

There are a few things I have heard whenever I have quit… to keep us motivated to stay quit… One of the statements that I keep close to my mind every single day today is this ‘You are only one cigarette away from being a smoker again”…

This statement reminds me two things.. One is that I will never escape the possibility of losing it… Second it tells me I am a non smoker now… Third it makes me feel I took the right decision…

Will I stay put on this always.. I don’t know.. but that is what is on top of my priorities…. I know I was suppose to talk about my battles.. They were brutal…. and I think I am in it always… just that… I am winning now….

Categories: Life, On Life

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